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The Look Test
The Look Test
Jim Meadows
Published by Swampy Meadows
09-30-2008
The Look Test

BEVERLY HILLS (MI) -– There is a scene in one of my favorite movies entitled “The Devil’s Advocate” with Al Pacino and Keanu Reeves that has always stuck with me for some reason. Sorry to spoil it for those who haven’t seen the flick, but Al plays John Milton/the Devil to Keanu’s ultra-slick Florida attorney Kevin Lomax/his son/the Anti-Christ and is trying to explain to Reeves the benefits of not being so ****ed flashy. Says Pacino:

“But don't get too cocky. No matter how good you are. Don't let them see you coming -- make yourself small. Be the hick. The cripple. The nerd. The leper. The sh*tkicking surfer. Look at me -- I've been underestimated from day one. Do I look like a master of the universe? That's your only weakness, as far as I can tell.”

“You know what you're missing? What I have. This beautiful girl: she's just f***ed me every way she knows how -- we're done -- she's walking to the bathroom -- she turns back -- and there I am. She's looking at me, she's wondering, how did that happen? I'm a surprise. They never see me coming.”


Basically, what Al is saying is that sometimes there can be distinct advantages to not passing “the look test.”

I can identify.

As a pick-up hoops junkie, I rely on failing the “look test” to give me an advantage every single time I step on the court. Let’s face it, for some unknown reason 5’7” white guys who are 58 years old with gray hair just don’t strike fear into the hearts of streetballin’ youngsters these days. That is, until we start playing.

On one of my recent trips to Chicago, I visited Paschen Playground again and was playing 2-on-2 with another ‘older’ dude (he was maybe 35 or 40) vs. two HS-aged guys. The one young fella was a very good athlete, but he really slacked off on defense. Unfortunately for him, he was covering me. I consistently knocked down 3 pointers on him because he refused to believe that I could keep making them. I could and I did.

Waiting on the sidelines was a streetballin’ friend of his, as well as a really young kid, maybe 12 or 13 years old. When our game was over, the guy on the sidelines improbably suggested that he and his friend would play the rest of us 2-on-4. I countered that we ought to play 3-on-3 and that we should get him, so that he and his friend could cover each other. My old school teammate said screw it, we’ll take the 12 year old kid and play ‘em straight up. I figured I love a challenge, so why not and got ready to take the ball out. Mr. Sidelines proceeded to tell his friend “I’ve got ‘Pops’…I want to cover him…he ain’t gonna score on me like he did on you.”

“Really?” I replied. “You want some of this? Come and get it.” And he proceeded to overplay me, which made him readily susceptible to head fakes and left my fellow old-schooler wide open for easy buckets, since young Mr. No-D was now covering him instead of me.

But the real revelation was the 12 year old kid. I hit him with passes for a couple of layups and he made them. He pump-faked, drained a jumper over one of the HS guys and flashed me a big, knowing grin that said “I got this.” He made the difference for us in the game, which we won easily. It turns out that this old guy who doesn’t pass the “look test” got fooled by a younger version of himself, a kid who appeared too youthful to be a ballplayer, but who most assuredly was.

I bring this up because the ALDS and NLDS start on Wednesday, my favorite time of year in the MLB season as every game, hell, every pitch, means something. The rest of the country will get to see what Red Sox fans have known for 2 years now: when it comes to the “look test” Boston has got one guy who has never passed it, but continues to produce in spite of that fact -- Dustin Pedroia.

The dude has a million nicknames on the Sox’ MBs: “The Wee Man”, “Laser Show”, “The Little Guy”, “Pedro”, “Pedey” and my personal favorite, “Shorty.” As I always tell the Swampettes, if they wanna know what their old man would look like in a MLB uniform, take a good, long look at “Shorty.”

I’ve got a couple links for you. The first one is a few weeks old and addresses the other issue besides Pedroia’s size that really doesn’t pass visual muster -– his big ‘ol swing:

http://www.boston.com/sports/basebal.../12/swing_man/

The second is from Sunday’s Boston Globe entitled “Most Valuable Half Pint” and is an in-depth profile of DP which chronicles how he has had to fight his entire life to be taken seriously as a ballplayer…and yet he has always delivered:

http://www.boston.com/sports/basebal...ble_half_pint/

My favorite line in the article is when Pedroia challenges Cleveland Browns QB Brady Quinn to a ping pong game and taunts him with this:

“You want a piece of me, meat?”

And then proceeds to totally kick Quinn’s butt.

Enjoy the playoffs!

That’s it “From the Swamp.”
You can email me at: swampy@udpride.com
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  #1  
By Binnie Bombs 33 on 09-30-2008, 11:24 AM
Pedroia also is very confident, I love it.

A story from Peter Gammons, "After Barry Bonds hit a double in Fenway Park last year, little Pedroia all 5-5 of him walked over and said, 'Sorry for breaking all of your records at Arizona State.' Then just walked away."

When was the last time you saw a MLB player who was 5-5 hit cleanup? Never. When Manny got traded he did it for a week and proceeded to hit 663 with 5 homers before being moved back to the 2 spot.


Here's to another "Hunt for Red Soxtober!"
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  #2  
By CraSch on 09-30-2008, 06:27 PM
Barry Bonds went to college? Weird
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  #3  
By Xenia UDFan on 09-30-2008, 11:11 PM
You can refer to the "look test" or whatever the hell you want, no way they make it past the Angels. I'll be impressed if they push it to 6 games.
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  #4  
By Swampy Meadows on 10-01-2008, 08:25 AM
Xenia UD Fan:

The Sox have swept the LAAA the last 2 times they've faced them in the playoffs. Lester, Dice K (who is very tough on the road) and then Beckett--I'll take my chances.
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  #5  
By GetFlyeredup on 10-03-2008, 09:20 AM
Originally Posted by Xenia UDFan View Post
You can refer to the "look test" or whatever the hell you want, no way they make it past the Angels. I'll be impressed if they push it to 6 games.
I'll be impressed as well considering it is a best of 5 game series. Sox will win it in 4.
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  #6  
By Xenia UDFan on 10-03-2008, 10:11 AM
Originally Posted by GetFlyeredup View Post
I'll be impressed as well considering it is a best of 5 game series. Sox will win it in 4.
Haha, I suppose I don't follow baseball closely enough, even though that proves difficult to do living in New York.
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